A Christmas Accident

By Annie Eliot Trumbull

Edited by Jane Mouttet

At first, the two yards were as similar as the two houses, each house being the exact copy of the other. They were just two of those little red brick dwellings that one always sees side by side on the outskirts of a city, looking as if the occupants must be alike, too. But these two families were quite different. Mr. Gilton, who lived in one, was a cross sort of man and was well-to-do, as cross people sometimes are. He and his wife lived alone and did not have much going out and coming in. Mrs. Gilton would have liked more of it. Still, she had given up thinking about it, for her husband had said so many times that it was women’s tomfoolery to want to have people, whom you weren’t anything to and who weren’t anything to you, ringing your doorbell all the time and bothering around in your dining room—which of course it was. She would have believed it if a woman ever did believe anything a man says many times.

In the other house, there were five children, and, as Mr. Gilton said, they had a family too large, and they ought to have gone somewhere else. They would have gone had it not been for the fence. Still, when Mr. Gilton put it up, Mr. Bilton told him it was three inches too far on his land. Mr. Gilton said he could go to law about it, expressing the idea forcibly. Mr. Bilton was foolish enough to take his advice. The decision went against him, and much of his money went with it, for it was a lengthy, teasing lawsuit. Instead of being three inches of the ground, it might have been three degrees of the Arctic Circle for the trouble in getting at it. So, Mr. Bilton had to stay where he was.

Then, the yards began to take on those little differences that soon grew very marked. Neither family would plant any vines because they would have been sure to beautify the other side. Consequently, the fence, in all its primitive boldness, stood out uncompromisingly. The one or two little bits of trees grew carefully on the farther side of the enclosure so as not to be mixed up in the trouble at all. But Mr. Gilton’s grass was cut smoothly by the man who made the fires, while Mr. Bilton only found a chance to cut his once in two weeks. Then, by and by, Mr. Gilton bought a red garden bench and put it under the tree nearest to the fence. No one ever went out and sat on it, to be sure. Still, it represented the visible flush of prosperity to the Bilton children. Cora Cordelia wanted to peer through the fence and gaze upon that red bench, thinking it was a charming place to play house. She was unaware that much red paint would have come off on her back. Cora Cordelia was the youngest of the five. All the rest had straightforward names—John, Walter, Fanny, and Susan—but when it came to Cora Cordelia, luxuries were becoming very scarce in the Bilton family. Mrs. Bilton felt that she must make up for it by being lavish in one direction or another. She had wished to name Fanny, Cora, Susan, and Cordelia, but she had yielded to her husband and called one after his mother and one after herself and then gave both her favorite names to the youngest of all. Cora Cordelia was a pretty little girl, prettier than both her names.

After the red bench came a quicksilver ball that was put in the middle of the yard and reflected all the glory of its owner, albeit in a somewhat distorted form. This effort of human ingenuity filled the Bilton children with admiration bordering on awe; Cora Cordelia spent hours gazing at it until called in and reproved by her mother for admiring so many things she could not afford to have. After this, she only admired it covertly.

Slight distinctions like these barbed the arrows of contrast and comparison and kept the disadvantages of the neighborhood ever-present.

Then, it was a constant annoyance to have their surnames so much alike. Matters were made more unpleasant by mistakes of the butcher, the grocer, and so on—Gilton, 79 Holmes Avenue, was so much like Bilton, 77 Holmes Avenue. Gilton changed his butcher every time he sent his dinner to Bilton, and though the mistakes were generally rectified, neither of the two families ever forgot the time the Biltons ate, positively ate, the Gilton dinner, under a misapprehension. Mrs. Bilton apologized, and Mrs. Gilton boldly told her husband that she was glad they’d had it and hoped they’d enjoyed it, which only made matters worse. Altogether, it was a dark day; the only joy was that fearful one snatched by John, Walter, Susan, Fanny, and Cora Cordelia from the undoubted excellence of the roast.

Of course, there was an assortment of minor difficulties. The smoke from the Biltons’ kitchen blew in through the windows of the Giltons’ sitting room when the wind was in one direction. When it was in the other, many of the clothes from the Giltons’ clothesline were blown into the Biltons’ yard. Fanny, Susan, or Cora Cordelia had to be sent out to pick them up and drop them over the fence again, which Mrs. Bilton said was very wearing, as it must have been. Things like this were always happening, but matters reached a climax regarding the dog. It wasn’t a large dog, but it was a tiresome one. It got up early in the morning and barked. We all know that early rising is a good thing and honorable among all men. Still, it ought to be done quietly, out of regard for others. A dog that constantly barks between five and seven in the morning should be suppressed, even if it is necessary to use force. Everybody agreed with the Biltons about that—everybody except the Giltons themselves, who, by some one of nature’s freaks, didn’t mind it. Mrs. Bilton often said she wished Mrs. Gilton could be a light sleeper for a week and see what it was like. So, too, everybody thought that Mr. Bilton had right on his side when he complained that this dog came into his yard, apparently indifferent to any coolness between the estate owners, and ran over a bed of geraniums. One thing and another was the small Bilton offset to the Gilton bench and ball. But when one morning, for the first time, that dog remained quiet and restful and was found cold and poisoned, and Mr. Gilton was loud in his accusations of the Bilton boys and their father, public opinion wavered for a moment. After that accident, no member of either family spoke to any member of the other. That was the way matters stood the day before Christmas.

It was snowing hard, and the afternoon grew dark rapidly, and the whirling flakes pursued a blinding career. Despite that, everybody was out doing the last thing. Mrs. Gilton was not, to be sure. Of course, they would have a big dinner, but even that was all arranged for, although the turkey hadn’t come, and her husband would stop and see about it on his way home. She shuddered as the possibility of its having gone to the Biltons occurred to her. But she didn’t believe it had—they hadn’t the same butcher.

Meanwhile, there was so little to do. It was too dark to read or sew, and she sat idly at the window looking out at the passers and the driving snow. Everybody else was in a hurry. She wished she, too, had reason to hasten down for a last purchase or to light the lamp to finish a little dainty sewing, as she used to do when she was a girl. She seemed to have so few friends now with whom she exchanged Christmas greetings. Was it then only for children and youth, this Christmas cheer? And must she necessarily have left it behind her with her girlhood? No, she knew better than that. She felt that there was a deeper significance in the Christmas tide than can come home to the hearts of children and unthoughtfulness. Yet, it had grown to be so painfully like other days—an occasion for a little more significant dinner that was about all. With an unconscious sigh, she looked across to the Bilton house. Plenty of people over there to make merry. Five stockings to hang up. She wished she might have sent something in. To be sure, there was the dog, but that was some time ago. Very likely, the dog would have been dead now, anyhow. She felt this logic was not irrefutable, but she wished she could have sent some paper parcels just the same. So strong had this impulse been that she had said to her husband somewhat timidly that morning—

“There are many of those Bilton children for whom to get presents.”

“More fools they that get ’em presents, then,” he had pleasantly replied.

“I don’t suppose he has much to buy them with,” she continued.

“He had enough to buy poison for my dog,” exclaimed her husband, giving his newspaper an angry shake.

“I’d almost like to send them some cheap little toys.”

“Well, as long as you don’t quite like to, it won’t do any harm,” he said with some violence, laying down his newspaper and looking at her so as not to be misunderstood. “But you see that the liking doesn’t get any farther.”

“It’s Christmas, you know,” said his brave wife.

“Oh, no, I don’t know it!” he replied gruffly. “I haven’t fallen over forty children a minute in the street with their ridiculous parcels, and I haven’t had women drop brown-paper bundles that come undone all over me when they crowd into the horse car, and I haven’t found it impossible to get to the shirt-collar counter on account of Christmas novelties! Oh, no, I didn’t know it was Christmas!”

After that, there was not much to be said, for we all know Christmas is dreadfully annoying, and the last thing a man in this sort of temper wants to hear about is peace and goodwill.

Even though Mrs. Gilton looked over to her neighbors with an envious feeling this dark afternoon, their Christmas cheer was not as abounding as it had been in more prosperous times. There was not very much money to be spent this year, and they were obliged to give up something. Mr. and Mrs. Bilton decided it should be the Christmas dinner; they would have a simple luncheon and let all the money to be spared go for the stockings. Each child had its own sum to invest for others, and there was still a tiny amount for the older family members. That it was a small amount, Mrs. Bilton felt strongly as she went from shop to shop. But when she reached home again, she was somewhat encouraged; there was such an air of joyous expectation in the house, and her purchases looked larger now that they were away from the glittering counters. Then, each of the five children came to her separately and confided to her the nothing less than excellent results of judicious bargaining which had enabled them to buy useful and beautiful presents for each of the others out of the sums entrusted to their care, ranging in amount from the two dollars of John to the fifty cents of Cora Cordelia. She felt sure that there were further secrets yet, secrets attended by brown paper and string, which she had taken the greatest care for the last two weeks not heedlessly to expose—riddles of which the solution lay perilously near her eyes, which would be revealed to her astonished gaze the next morning.

She had reason to believe that even Cora Cordelia was making something for her. Though it was difficult for her to ignore that it was a knit washcloth, she had hitherto avoided absolute certainty. So, it was a cheerful afternoon at the Biltons’.

Meanwhile, down the city’s main street, there was a confusing scene. It was darker there than where the streets were more open. Although several daring spirits of that adventurous turn of mind led people into byways of discovery, who asserted that the street lamps were lighted, it was not generally believed. The snow was blowing down and up and across and getting more and more unmanageable under the feet of foot passengers every moment. It was cold, windy, blinding, crowded, and many other disturbing things, all of which Mr. Gilton felt the full force of as he stood on the corner where he had just bought his turkey. It was a fine turkey and had been a good bargain, and though he had to carry it home himself, there was nothing derogatory in that. He would have been thrilled with a glow of satisfaction if it had been anybody else. Still, Mr. Gilton was long past glows of satisfaction—it was years since he had permitted himself to have such things.

“Jour—our—nal! fi-i-i-ve cents!” screamed an intermittent newsboy in his ear.

“Get out!” replied Mr. Gilton, the uncompromising nature of his language being intensified by the fact that he jumped nearly two feet from the suddenness of the newsboy’s attack. Even the newsboy, accustomed to the short words of an unfriendly world and usually quite indifferent to it, was impressed by the severity of the suggestion and hastily moved on. Possibly, his cold, wet little existence had been rendered morbidly susceptible by the general good feeling of the hour, one lady having even spontaneously given him five cents.

After this exchange of amenities, Mr. Gilton stepped into his horse car. It was crowded, of course, as small horse cars that run once in half an hour are apt to be, and he had to stand up, and the turkey legs stuck out of the brown paper in a very conspicuous way. If Mr. Gilton had been anybody else, he would have been chaffed about his turkey because to make up for the conveniences that the horse car line did not furnish the public, the large-hearted public furnished the horse car line with an unusual amount of friendliness. There was almost always something going on in these horse cars. Their social privileges were quite a feature. Tonight, they were in unusual force on account of the season. But nobody said anything to Mr. Gilton. Only when he jerked the bell and stepped off, one stout man with his overcoat collar turned up to his ears said, without turning his head:—

“I supposed he was going to give the turkey to the conductor.”

Everybody laughed at that end of the car except for a tiny old lady in the corner, who was a stranger and visiting and who was left with the impression that the gentleman who got off must be a very kind man. It was darker, blowier, and snowier than when he had left the corner. Mr. Gilton floundered through the unbroken drifts up the little path to the door with increasing grudges in his heart against the difficulties of Christmas. The lock was off, and he went in, slamming the door after him. There was no light in the hall, and he murmured loudly against the inconvenience.

“Confound it!” he said, “why didn’t they light the gas? I’m not one of those confounded Biltons; I can afford to pay for what I don’t get,” and, without pausing to take off his hat and coat, he strode to the sitting-room door and flung it open. That was an awful moment. The sudden change from the cold and darkness almost blinded him and confirmed the impression that he was the victim of an illusion. The sound of many voices, and then the hush of sudden consternation, was in his ears. There was a lamp, and there was a fire, and there between them sat Mr. Bilton on one side and Mrs. Bilton on the other, and roundabout, in various unconventional attitudes, sat four Bilton children. And there, in the midst of them, in his heavy overcoat, with snow melting on his hat, beard, and shoulders, stood Mr. Gilton. The unexpected scene, the amazed faces gazing into his, rendered him speechless; he wondered vaguely if he were losing his reason. Then, in a flush of enlightenment, he realized what had happened; thanks to the storm outside, he had entered the wrong house. Naturally, his first impulse was towards flight. Still, as his bewildered gaze slipped about the room, it fell upon five stockings hung against the mantelpiece and stayed there fascinated. Five foolish, limp, expressionless stockings—it was long since he had seen such an unreasonable spectacle. Then he recollected himself and looked around him. Perhaps even then, if he had made a dash for the door, he might have escaped, and matters have been none the worse. But something dreadful occurred in that instant of hesitation caused by the sudden sight of those five stockings. It must be premised that Cora Cordelia did not know Mr. Gilton very well by sight, being in the first place small and not noticing and, in the second, filled with an unreasoning fear that caused her to flee whenever she had seen him approach. This is the only excuse for what she did, for while her mother was feebly murmuring, as if in extenuation, “We thought it was John coming in,” Cora Cordelia clasped her hands in delirious delight and cried aloud, “It’s Santa Claus! Oh, it’s Santa Claus!” Could anything more awful happen to a cross man, a very cross man, than to be taken for Santa Claus!

Mr. Gilton looked at Cora Cordelia and wondered why she had not been slaughtered in her cradle.

“And,” exclaimed Susan Bilton, with sudden enthusiasm, “he has brought us a turkey for tomorrow’s dinner!”

The truth was that Susan had been approaching the age when she became skeptical about Santa Claus. Still, she could not resist this sudden appearance.

No one could appreciate the nonsense of the whole situation better than Mr. Gilton, and yet, strangely enough, together with his annoyance, was mingled a touch of the strange feeling that had dawned upon him first when he saw the stockings. To be sure, it only added to his annoyance, but it was there. By this time—it was really a very short time—Mrs. Bilton had recovered herself and risen, and Mr. Bilton had risen too.

“Hush, children; it is not Santa Claus,” she said, “it is Mr. Gilton. We are glad to see you, Mr. Gilton. ” She held out her hand to him. “Won’t you sit down?” She felt he had come in the Christmas spirit and was anxious to meet him halfway.

“Yes,” said her husband, coming forward and instantly taking his cue from his wife—for he was really a lovely man—”we are very glad.” His manner had a specific stiffness, for a man cannot always change entirely in a moment as a woman can. Still, Mr. Gilton was too perplexed to notice this. In the incomprehensible way that one’s mind has of clinging to unimportant things at great crises, while he was fuming with rage and bothered with this strange feeling which was not precisely rage, he was wondering how in the world he was going to sit down with that ridiculous turkey, with its ridiculous legs, in his arms, and not look more absurd than he did now. In this moment of absentmindedness, he mechanically took Mrs. Bilton’s hand and shook it. After that, of course, there was nothing to do except to shake Mr. Bilton’s. Then, he began to know it was all up. He had not spoken yet, but now he made a frantic effort to save what might be left besides honor. “I came—” he began, “I came—came to your house—” There he paused a moment, and that unlucky child with that tendency to be possessed by one idea, which is characteristic of small and trivial minds, and for which she should have been shaken, burst in with, “And did the reindeer bring you, and are they outside?”

He almost groaned, so overwhelmed was he by this new idiocy. Reindeer! If those overworked, struggling car-horses could have heard that! Then Mrs. Bilton, pitying his evident confusion, came to his assistance.

“Don’t mind the children, Mr. Gilton,” she said, her cheeks flushing and looking very pretty with the excitement of the unusual circumstances. We are glad you came; however, you made your way here. I think we may thank Christmas Eve for it. Now, do take off your overcoat and sit down.”

Oh, mispraised woman’s tact! What complications you may produce! That finished it, of course. He sat down. In those few moments, that strange feeling had grown marvelously stronger. It seemed to be made up of the most diverse elements—a mixture of green wreaths and his own childhood, and his mother, and a top he had not thought of for years, and the wide fireplace at home, and a stable with a child in it, and a picture, in a book he used to read, of a lot of angels in the sky, one particular one in the middle, and underneath it some words—what were the words? He’d forgotten they had anything to do with Christmas, anyway.

“But you did bring us the turkey, didn’t you?” Cora Cordelia said, helping her mother.

To do the child justice—for even Cora Cordelia has a right to demand justice—her manners were corrupted by Christmas expectancy.

“Cora Cordelia, I’m ashamed of you,” said Mrs. Bilton.

“Yes,” said Mr. Gilton, the words wringing from his lips while beads stood on his forehead. ” Yes, I brought you the turkey.”

“Did you really?” exclaimed Mrs.Bilton, who thought he had all the time. “That was very kind of you.”

“Will you please take it—take it away?” he said, wishing to have something over which we associate with the dentist. So Mrs. Bilton took the turkey, thanked him, and gave it to Fanny, who carried it out to the kitchen, and Mr. Gilton gave one last look at its legs as it went through the door, feeling that now he must wake up from this nightmare. But things only went further and became more incredible and upsetting, only, strangely enough, that feeling of horror began to wear off, and that singular strain of association with all sorts of Christmas things to grow stronger. He could hardly believe that it was no worse when he found himself seated by the littered table, with Mrs. Bilton near and Mr. Bilton over by the fire again, listening to first one and then the other and occasionally letting fall a word himself, his conversational powers seeming to thaw out along with the snow on his greatcoat. These words themselves were a surprise to him. He was pretty sure that he started them with a creditable gruffness. Still, the Christmas air mellowed them in a highly unsatisfactory fashion so that they fell on his own ears quite otherwise than as he had meant they should sound.

Moreover, the general tenor of the conversation was exceedingly perplexing. It was all about how fine it was of him to come this evening, how they had often regretted the hard feeling, and how things always did get exaggerated. Of course, he would not have believed a word of it if he had been able to get any grip on the situation, but he wasn’t, and he just went on assenting to it all as if it were true. There came a time when Mr. Bilton cleared his throat, hesitated a moment, and then said boldly,—

“I think I ought to tell you, Mr. Gilton, that I had nothing whatever to do with the death of your dog.” Mr. Gilton felt the ground slipping away from under his very feet. That dog had been his piece of resistance, as it were. “I wouldn’t have poisoned him,” went on Mr. Bilton, “for a hundred dollars. But,” he added, with a queer little smile, “I wasn’t going to tell you so, you know.”

“Of course, you weren’t,” exclaimed Mr. Gilton hurriedly, with a touch of that unholy excitement that a lapse from grammar imparts.

“We wouldn’t, any of us,” asserted Walter.

“No,” said Susan, Fanny, and Cora Cordelia.

Then, it came out that the whole family had rather admired the dog than otherwise. Here, John came in, his entrance sounding very much like Mr. Gilton’s. He nearly fell over when he saw the visitor. Still, he had time to pull himself together. Cora Cordelia had snatched that moment to show Mr. Gilton her gifts for the family. He was bound hand and foot with helplessness. Then they all came and showed him their gifts. While he examined them, Mr. and Mrs. Bilton carefully averted their eyes and gazed hard at the opposite wall. Cora Cordelia urged him, in stage whispers, not to let them suspect. It was pitiable the state to which he was reduced.

Of course, resisting this Christmas enthusiasm was out of the question. To be sure, it came over him once with startling force as she showed him a toy waterwheel that went by sand—which she had purchased for her father at a low cost because the wheel could not be made to go—that Cora Cordelia was the very child that he had fallen over as she came hastening out of a toy-shop with a queerly shaped bundle, the day before, and so been further imbittered towards Christmas. Susan had purchased a cup and ball for her mother and, as she went out of the room for a moment, insisted upon Mr. Gilton’s trying to do it and see what fun it was. If Mr. Gilton lived to be a hundred, he would never forget the mingled feelings with which he awkwardly tried to get that senseless ball into that idiotic cup. At last, he stood up to go—it was after six o’clock—and they went with him to the door, wished him Merry Christmas, sent Merry Christmas to Mrs. Gilton, and said goodnight several times. He stumbled on through the snow, this time towards his own door. It had stopped snowing as suddenly and quietly as it had begun, and the stars had come out. He gazed up at them—something he very rarely did. They seemed a part of Christmas. Just before he turned in at his own gate, he looked back at the Bilton house. He shook his fist at it, but the expression on his face was such that the very same newsboy who had accosted him earlier failed utterly to recognize him and was encouraged to offer him a paper. He was pushing his way home with two papers left somewhat bleakly.

“I’ll take ’em both,” said this singular customer. “Here’s a quarter—never mind the change. It’s Christmas Eve, I believe—” and this when he knew perfectly well that a copy of that very same journal was waiting for him on his table. The boy looked at his quarter and looked again at his customer, recognized him, decided to buy a couple of hot sausages on the corner, and went on his way feeling that there was a new heaven and a new earth. Mrs. Gilton stood at the parlor window, anxiously peering out as he came up the path. She was in the hall as he entered.

“Why, Reuben,” she said, “I was afraid something had happened.”

Goodness gracious! As if something hadn’t happened! He turned away to hang up his overcoat and tried to speak crossly.

“Well,” he said, “I’ve lost my turkey. That’s happened.”

“Never mind,” said Mrs. Gilton quickly; “the other one came later, the first one, you know—so—so the Biltons didn’t get it this time.”

“They got the second one, though,” said Reuben, hanging up his hat.

“Oh, dear, did they? ” Mrs. Gilton said. Then she said, “Well, I don’t care if they did, so there! I guess they need it for their Christmas dinner.”

“No, they don’t,” said Reuben, turning around and facing her, “because they are going to eat part of ours. They are coming in tomorrow to have dinner with us—every one of them!” he asserted more loudly, on account of the expression on his wife’s face. “Bilton, his wife, and all the five children, down to Cora Cordelia! So we’ll have to have something for them to eat.”

If Mr. Gilton will always remember the cup and ball, Mrs. Gilton will always remember that moment. She went all over it in her mind whether she could manage him herself tonight, or whether to send Bridget right away then for the doctor, and if she hadn’t better say a policeman too, and whether he could be kept for the future in a private house, or would have to be confined in an asylum. She was inclining towards the asylum when he, going into the sitting room before her, turned round and laughed an odd little laugh. She began to think then that a private house would do.

The next day, they all dined together, which proved that it was not all a Christmas Eve illusion. There is a report in the neighborhood that the fence between the houses is to be taken down to make room for a tennis court for the Bilton children, but of course, this may not be true. It would have to be done in the summer, and if the effect of Christmas could be depended upon to last into the summer, this would be a very different sort of world.

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Tags: A Christmas Accident, Christmas, Christmas Stories